Why I ended up in the hospital the day after Christmas

BREAST IMPLANT ILLNESS:  What the doctors won’t tell you.

Once upon a time I was a really insecure girl…

I felt less than others and constantly felt like I wasn’t good enough. As I became older and the mainstream media constantly flashes us with how we should look act, dress, I felt even more insecure.  I did something I regretted later in life…I got breast implants, without knowing about breast implant illness and the long term impacts on the body.

• If you add childhood trauma to those insecurities…
• plus a couple bad relationships
• and a depressed state of mind, I was a bit of a mess.

I tried to be confident, yet other women would say something to me and my confidence would drop in a second, I felt I lost everything I had built in terms of self esteem.

So one day I decided I would become confident — and I went about it the way many women try to seek more happiness and confidence, through plastic surgery.

I thought if I changed my outside…

• I would be seen
• not ignored
• paid attention to
• embraced…

So I decided to get breast implants in my twenties.

HAVE YOU EVER DONE SOMETHING YOU REGRETED LATER ON?

I didn’t tell anyone about my surgery, except a couple close friends. I was embarrassed and ashamed and I didn’t want anyone to know.

I was also scared to tell my parents, about this intense surgical process (I’m sure they noticed ha ha) but they know now cause we had a beautiful conversation about it.  In Latin American culture, it’s taboo to talk about those things.

I charged the surgery on a credit card.  Then I quietly took time of work.  After the surgery, initially, I was super happy. I felt like the “new me” could conquer mountains.  Yet as the excitement slipped away, I was left to face that happiness didn’t come from the outside, and I didn’t know how to love myself.

As you fast forward a few years and I got really ill (see my story).  The inflammation in my body was so high, my white blood cells were not fighting disease.  We even went to Brazil to an alternative healing center and moved there, seeking answers to help heal my body.

• My body was weak.
• I was diagnosed with ameloblastoma, a tumor in my jaw, very aggressive, with no known cure.
• Fear was running my life.

YOUR TOUGHEST LESSON CAN BE YOUR GREATEST GIFT…

These years when I was so ill were the toughest part of my life.  Through this illness I discovered much about myself.  I unlocked trauma, feelings of not deserving, much emotional turmoil.  Through this journey I also discovered many gifts.  The gifts of figuring out that many things I was doing were not supporting my healing such as eating unhealthy processed food. Or drinking from plastics that became toxic when they touched the juice or water we were drinking from that container. Or worrying, a terrible toxic thing.

Then I started doing research about the implants and although they were considered “safe” saline implants like one of the best plastic surgeons in Beverly Hills sold them to me, they were still in a silicon container inside my body.

I was continually tired, my adrenals were burnt and I had bags and swelling under my eyes. I was eating healthy and exercising but what was causing all that inflammation in my body? What was happening?

I found a support group of over 100,000 women experiencing illness as a result of their breast implants. Women whose hair was falling, major weight loss and many who experienced fibromyalgia, lyme, hashimoto’s and many other chronic illnesses as a result of having plastic inside their body.

THE SILENCE WAS KILLING ME…

These are things nobody talks about. My implants were small and were just to boost my self confidence but my confidence was now at an all time low.

So I made a decision that would free my body, free my soul. To say good bye to these implants.

They served a purpose. In the journey of seeking outside comfort I found a deep love inside. I learned through this illness that learning to love myself and accept myself would be better than any adjustment to my outside self.

I am excited because one of the best doctors in LA who specializes in explants and helping women heal from breast implant illness had a cancellation last minute and I could get that spot, as I was on a waiting list for months.

I ended up getting my “FREEDOM CALL” with my surgery date within 9 days!

So that’s how I ended up at the hospital, by choice, on December 26^th.

Today I ask you to say a little prayer for me. And for the kind doctors who are helped me free myself from the bondage I put myself in.  I also ask you to pray for other women who are suffering from breast implant illness.  Many of my friends had worse symptoms, their hair falling out, tremendous allergic reactions, hashimoto, massive weight gain along with other factors.

If you know younger women who are considering breast implants read this post, please share if you care. Bigger breasts did not heal a lack of self acceptance.  The mind-shaming and post-worrying did not help either, though.

I have the most supportive husband Dave Ulloa. Thank you for being by my side and although you think I’m a little crazy, always supporting my crazy ideas.

Today I feel a new kind of freedom.

I’ve removed this dead weight. My posture will change. I will no longer hurt getting a massage or adjustment. I won’t feel uncomfortable when I run. I’m excited to no longer experience inflammation from breast implant illness and having these foreign objects in my body.

And I get to welcome a new version of myself, one who truly loves herself, without rules about how the outside should look.

If you are on a journey where you think you may be experiencing breast implant illness…message me and I’m happy to give you my resources so you can research and take care of yourself.

TODAY I AM FREE!

Please keep those prayers going, they move mountains!   It’s a four week healing period and I’m half way through my first four weeks post surgery.  It’s been intense, painful, difficult, but also happy, joyful and blissful.

Here’s my photo December 26th, my freedom day.  I was a bit nervous but super excited..as my beloved holds my hand before they put me to sleep..

Here’s the main fb group helping women with breast implant illness https://www.facebook.com/groups/Healingbreastimplantillness/?ref=share

And Dr Jae Chun in Newport Beach California, one of the best doctors in the world, for specializing in explants and being the architect of this process.

And please, do not just go to your plastic surgeon who originally put them in to remove them.  Most surgeons don’t know about breast implant illness and are not aware of how important it is to not just remove the implants, but also the capsule that forms around them.  Please go to someone recommended by the group in the website posted in the FB group above, that is how I found Dr. Chun.

I write this with love, and I choose to be open, authentic and vulnerable, because if one woman chooses to do this and become healthier, this will start a beautiful domino effect in her family, her circle, her world.

My sisters, my friends,

TOGETHER WE RISE UP.

Please share if you care…breast implant illness is a real thing.  And I hope to see you on social media.

Love,